Five Cocks to Block You

by Gentleman Loser

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    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

    It's got whiz bang laser excitement. Glory holes for holy rollers. Ultra-violet sleepers and infrared mollies. It's the flavor all the kids want! It's got everything you need. Just one download, just one hit, and you'll be right as rain. We don't advocate drug use with this album, but it probably couldn't hurt.

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about

The first and likely only full-length album that we plan on releasing.

This is it. The final, complete release of the first full (and it is very full indeed) length release by Gentleman Loser. The behemoth, the project that nearly killed the band, the CD that was delayed like...a fucking year. It is done, it is big, it is bad (the good kind of bad) and it is in your fucking face motherfuckers! We're not addicted to drugs, we're addicted to glamour and this CD is fucking shiny!

It's got some punk/metal-ish stuff, it's got some dancy shit, it's got some straight up weird shit, it's got a couple pretty tunes, and some ugly tunes, it's got that crunchy industrial sound one minute, and then bang...it's electro.

Josh Killcrop and Mr. Anonymous have plans for your soul and it's all laid out on this CD. So buy it now. Give us your money, and we'll give you salvation!

credits

released October 21, 2011

All songs Josh Killcrop, and Mr. Anonymous. Track twelve co-written by Little Red Wolf. Track fifteen co-written by Nick Anello (DJ Angelfire). Special thanks to Arhallogen, for bringing us in on the She's Lost Control cover; it was originally going to be part of this release got nixed to keep everything legal-beagle. As always special thanks to Nona Fishstixx and Genghis Cock PhD.

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Gentleman Loser Madison, Wisconsin

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Track Name: Overt Motivator Sequence
My unblinking eye is the top of your pyramid
The pupa is growing, controlling your life
Lady Gaga is swiftly reshaping the auras
Receiving transmissions from Manchurian spies

This is my mind / Outside my body
A dwindling spiral until nothing shows
God rests upon an event horizon
As it is above, so shall it be below

36 days of hypnotic implants
Bundled together and trapped for all time
Taken in boxes from fire to deserts
This Orwellian present, the reward for our crimes
Track Name: Let Them Fist Cake
It is my business to interrupt all your business
End commerce faster than dividends collect interest
Till the capitol collapses and we burn all the banks
No money no more oil, no more bombers or tanks

I want my violence to end all the violence
Let it rise like a river and leave nothing but silence
My time and your time and times it by ten
Until we become a massive torrent of women and men

Class war, race war, there is no mistake
To unreal to be true, and all to true to be fake
Every dollar you earn is two more that they'll take
So I say fuck 'em all
Let them fist cake

We've lost our senses because your so senseless
You've desensitized us and left us defenseless
And we'll come in the night, and start breaking glass
Recruit your sons and your daughters, it will happen so fast

And I pledge belligerence
To a fast burning flag
Of the great embarrassment
Of America
And to our fascist masters
May our money still flow
Into that great greedy fuckhole
We used to call home
Track Name: I'm Not Sexy, You're Just Drunk
I'm a dancing, pretty prancing, fucking fancy faggot
You're a righty, tighty whitey, such a mighty maggot
With a quickness, like a sickness, time for witless speaking
Litmus kit, I witness it, holy shit I'm peaking

I see hypocrisy as you try to set the tone
I smell the fruit on your bone

I see you sitting there, melting into all I can see
If I touched you would you stuff yourself so deep inside of me

Room's moving south
There's something in your mouth
And on and on and on and on it goes

It's nothing physical
Just something ritual
Another chemical
Another chemical

Feeling queasy, not so easy, fitful wheezy breathing
Room is spinning, blood is thinning, lights are interweaving
Why oh why am I so high, hard as I try I'm broken
So absurd, I lose each word, and is it heard or spoken?

All I taste is all the waste left over from the night before
The sheets are stained, there's an ache in my brain and it's got me wanting more

I see you sitting there, melting into all I can see
If I touched you would you commit an act of sodomy
Track Name: Fuck You, It's Christmas
Cut down a tree and waste electricity
Fuck you, it's Christmas
Buy some festive knick knacks, that fit nicely in your ass
Fuck you, it's Christmas
Dress your pets in elf hats, then have them lick fudge off your balls
Fuck you, it's Christmas
Serve food to the poor, and then drive away in your Prius
Fuck you, it's Christmas

You're driving long distances through twenty feet of snow
And it looks like your uncle started drinking right after church
You got tiny marshmallows in every side dish you eat
No one has presents, we're all just swapping gift cards

Max out your credit card, and help save the economy
Fuck you, it's Christmas
Wake up at fucking 4am to buy a piss-my-pants Elmo
Fuck you, it's Christmas
The war on Christmas is a war we can actually win
Fuck you, it's not Hanukkah
I'd fuck Gretchen Carlson's brains out, but somebody beat me to it
Fox News, makes me wet

'Twas the night before Christmas, and Saint Nick had come
Not for Jews or for Muslims, because their religions were dumb
With him he brought, one special present
The tiny Christ-child, the size of a pheasant
Down every chimney, leading him by the foot
'Till his swaddling clothes were coated in carcinogenic soot
And that is how Jesus got cancer of the balls
And as he died for our sins, he wish a merry Christmas to all

How is it that Rachel Ray and Martha Stewart shit holiday spirit
You're stuck making a Christmas dinner out of Spam and fucking peanut butter
Why the fuck do you want to go shopping right after Christmas?
Sit down, shut up, and enjoy your ugly new sweater
Track Name: Californowhere
The deck hits stop, quietly whirrs as it rewinds. I wake up, and see Ana's face, receding. I'm not even sure that she's real anymore.
I grab some of the stash that the kids tell me is stylish. Infra-red Mollies and Ultra-violet Sleepers I walk to the corner store. Fresh water and bread. Preachers on the corner selling pills to see god Whenever you try to put some money on the collection plate, they always say "no, first time's free" I take them, but I don't see god.

When I return, I see the rusted gate is gone, no doubt part of some street nesting behavior The brick building still alive in decay, mattresses spread out randomly on floors, owners asleep at best
I find my way to the master bedroom, clear out my spot and sit, back against the wall. I can almost hear her heartbeat inside there. I pull out the deck, slot the tape. Press play.

Ana is in the other room, cooking dinner. I'm installing the new lights in the bedroom. She calls out to me, asks me to come in and tell her "does this taste funny to you?" Upstairs a child giggles. I turn the corner and Ana is standing there, wearing an old concert t-shirt. She still looks beautiful after all these years. If I can squint just right, she looks like the first day I met her. She smiles and beckons me over, leading me by the finger, she spins on her heal. A flash of fire in her eyes. I reach out to touch her face...

The deck hits stop, quietly whirrs as it rewinds. I wake up. My back against the cold wall, a homeless man next to me coughs.

A bad mix these pills. My heart slows. Beginning it's long descent flat to the bottom. Darkness gathers in all the corners. It's fitting...now. All somehow symmetrical in it's own way. What's left of my past buried in the wall behind me, and what's left of my future in every room of this house. A memory, a parasite that robs you of happiness.
I never meant to hurt you. but I just couldn't let you leave. you wouldn't stop. and I couldn't lose myself in it like you did. We couldn't bring her back. and I couldn't bring you back. You were already gone. I just brought resolution to the abstract. It's okay Ana. I will see you soon.

I pull out the deck...
It will be better this time.
...slot the tape...
It will be perfect, forever and ever
...I press play.
Track Name: Altitude (feat. Little Red Wolf)
Calm down, nothings wrong, the whole wicked world is ending

We don't recognize each other, but here we are together

This is too slow, nice but not at altitude
Track Name: New Rose
All along we play the role of black sheep